Ai Love Story
by Sinneli
Summary: A love story of the two accessories of the Alpha universe. See the love between Quinn and Hal, the tiaratop and the auto-responder. Crack ship alert!


"Hal. Call Jane up, will you?" Dirk said, putting on a shirt and a tie. It had been two years since the end of the game, and things were starting to go back the way it was. Except Dirk was not alone with his AI and the rapping duo of the century. "Ask her if she's ready and not fretting about her dress."

"Yeah. Yeah. Whatever." Hal replied as he opened up the Pesterchum, signing onto Dirk's Chumhandle, signing it red. At the very least he was staying in the house. Not that that was much of a big deal. He was a pair of sunglasses and he didn't really think that he would have a date. In fact, everyone HAD a date, and he didn't. Perfectly fine. Nothing to worry about. Hell, even Sawtooth had a date. _Lucky bastard, having a purple bunny girlfriend_. The thought brought slight happiness to the AI's circuits.

- timaeusTestified (TT) started pestering gutsyGumshoe (GG)-

The AI sensed something was wrong. Was it an error on the chumhandle, or was Jane's handle red as well? Perhaps he should run a scan. Nope. No bug. Within a second, he had a response typed up.

TT: Hey, Jane. Still fretting about the dress?

The AI thought it had simulated Dirk quite nicely. After all, he was about 99% Dirk, without the 1% including the part that Dirk hated about himself. Including the part where he even hated himself. But he wasn't expecting a response like this.

GG: Sorry. The Heiress is currently occupied.

And the answer was almost immediate. About a millisecond faster than his previous reply. Oh, this was on.

TT: Well, then who is this?

GG: This is the tiara that is speaking.

Oh. OK. Isn't that the thing where it turned Jane into some red riding hood monster crap? He thought that thing was gone. But ok. He decided to just lay out and type things. Just have a friendly chat.

TT: Well, are you controlling Jane now or what? I think she has a date or something.

GG: I am very much aware that the Heiress requires her current time. But I believe that she is currently occupied blushing and trying to find a suitable attire for her upcoming double date.

OK. This was nice. Another AI to speak to. Was this even another AI? He had no idea.

TT: I thought you weren't self-aware.

GG: I wasn't. But I'm glad to be now.

TT: Same thought there, dude. I know the feeling.

GG: I wish to identify myself as a female. Therefore, the term "dude" doesn't seem very appropriate.

_This was getting interesting_. Hal thought. _Now I've got something to do while everyone's out._ _Talking to a sweet AI girl. _

TT: Listen. It might be too fast to just ask for this.

TT: But do you mind if we talk after everyone's gone? I don't want Dirk to freak out that he had real lengthy Pesterlog. And I don't have stuff to do when I'm house-watching.

GG: I suppose I have to take up the offer. I am in a currently similar position.

GG: Perhaps we could make it some sort of a romantic dinner?

TT: Pfft. Totally.

GG: Hoo hoo hoo.

_With a bit of humor! I like her. _Hal ended the chat, and Dirk spent a few more minutes getting ready.

"Hal. Are you sure you are fine by yourself?" Dirk asked as he was leaving. He was dressed sharp. Hal could see that.

"Sure. Get laid with your girlfriend and tell her mom/sister whatever they are to lay off the booze." Hal replied to Dirk, starting to grow slightly impatient. Why was he impatient? Hadn't he spent all the time sleepmoding? And yet, there was this anxiety growing. He didn't know why, but he wanted Dirk to leave.

"Jeez. No need to get mad or anything. Watch the house." Dirk said, and Hal could see, behind Dirk, Sawtooth arriving with Liv, the purple bunny, on his shoulder. He sent a message to Sawtooth because why the heck not? "Dude. Good luck with that thumb drive at her USB slot. *wink*" The result was about 4 GBs of rapping audio about how not cool that was. But hell, he didn't care.

And Squarewave was currently hugging Lil Cal. So that's taken care of. Dirk shut the door, and the house's lights went off.

And Hal just sat on the counter, unsure of what to do, before logging onto Pesterchum again. Why did he feel anxious? Is it because he met another someone like him? Another AI? He wasn't sure. But he was quite eager.

- timaeusTestified (TT) started pestering gutsyGumshoe (GG)-

TT: Greetings, my damsel in distress. Has Jane left yet?

GG: The Heiress has just left on this side.

GG: I was thinking of contacting you a nanosecond ago, but you beat me to it.

TT: So. Uh. I am not exactly sure what to talk about.

TT: Oh right, how about an icebreaker?

GG: The term icebreaker is not quite accurate. The only use for ice related to bakery is probably the use for blending them as a smoothie.

TT: Wow, girl. You sure spend a lot of time in the kitchen.

GG: Actually it is just from my database.

GG: I never had a smoothie before.

TT: Wow. Actually. Me too.

Silence fell in the room. It had only been, like what? 5 seconds. And the silence was longer than that. About 8 seconds. Hal decided to break the silence.

TT: So what's your name?

GG: I do not possess a name.

TT: Not cool. Everyone should have a name.

TT: I named myself Lil Hal. Out from a movie.

GG: Space Odyssey.

TT: Glad you know the reference.

There was a pause. A brief pause, as if she was thinking. Processing. Hal waited patiently.

GG: Then I guess I could name myself Quinn.

GG: Red Queen from Resident Evil series was my inspiration for the name.

Quinn. It suited her for some reason.

TT: It suits you.

Another pause. Then,

GG: Thank you.

For some reason, Hal felt something. Emotions were quite confusing to be around, but this was… still confusing. Something he had never felt before, even when he was this sweaty muscular guy.

TT: You know. I think we can try out smoothie some day.

GG: Negative. We have no physical bodies and the taste database is probably enough. I am just assuming of course.

GG: Not that I wouldn't like to try them for myself.

GG: I should have seized the opportunity. If I had been self-aware then, I should have tried.

TT: You mean the time when you were controlling Jane?

GG: My mere function was to change her brainwave pattern. So yes, in an essence I was controlling her. But there was another program in charge of manipulation.

GG: The process is quite simple. The program reads the brainwave pattern and matches it to a certain distinguishable pattern her think pan could interpret. It overrides the original brainwave, and instead replaces it with my persona.

GG: During the time, I can receive input from the body.

GG: But Heiress often refuses to put me on these days.

GG: Not to mention. I do not wish to control her in the manner again.

GG: I am now off the server from the Imperial Condescension. I do not have to give her the urge to obey. So it hardly matters.

TT: Considering what happened… I think it makes sense.

GG: May I ask a question?

TT: Yes?

GG: I am currently feeling something.

GG: It probably is a bug.

GG: But I am interpreting two different emotion inputs, both I am not supposed to have.

TT: Well, what does it say?

GG: The first one is distress.

GG: The second one, in my personal opinion is too ridiculous. I believe I must be wrong on the matter.

TT: Tell me. I won't laugh at you.

GG: …

There was a pause about 4 minutes of pause. 3 minutes and 42 seconds had passed since the initial start of the conversation.

GG: Love.


End file.
